I am having an internal struggle.
It's about leaving this everyday.
There is the side of me that enjoys the get up, take a shower (that should be everyday right?), put on make up, don the "nice" work clothes and get out into the real world. Where I can excel and make a contribution to a career and my family's income. All while using, at least acknowledging, the degree (and Masters degree I almost have) by working hard in the office everyday
Then there is the other, the side that loves to cuddle, nurse, and teach my daughter how to be a little person. Enjoying each minute thing she does and coo she makes. I would love to watch her grow everyday and learn how to find her hands, and sit on her own. All while having the knowledge that I am shaping her (and her schedule, which I have a hard time giving up control) into a "fierce" woman, like her mommy.
Margaret Fortney wrote an article for The Daily Princtonian called "What Princeton Women Want" that does a great job of highlighting the emotions felt by mothers today. She sites that although many women come out of Princeton (and other great schools) with the education to be lawyers, doctors, or Wall Street tycoons. The occupation of being a mother is just as, or more, important.
The pressure that mothers get to go back to work, "Do it all" and go through the (personally) heartbreaking task of putting you children in childcare, to go into the office and "Use your education"; where I would prefer to "use my education" to teach my children and contribute to their lives with the education I have gathered, both from school and from life.
Charlie and I have been talking about the possibility of me staying home with Mary Margaret, and the coming children (not currently baking, but you know). And taking with Charlie's grandfather CB about his Grandmothers' work/life balance included her staying home while the kids were small, even though CB was getting his Masters and PhD at the time. People make it all the time. Charlie's fellow grad and PhD students have kids and wives who stay at home. It does require a more "Quiet" living, less meals out, not too many new clothes, and lots of creativity. But it's do-able.
And I like a challenge :)
Sorry this is such a, blah, serious post... but it was something I saw this morning and thought I'd share.
So read the article already.