Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Did you say.... Mom?

This is My mom with me and my kinda-cousin Anna

I don't think I need to tell you how many things to disregard  this picture

In close to 2 weeks... that sounds really short and really long... Depending on who you're talking to...

Charlie would say long, considering it's another 2 weeks he's not sleeping in the Big Bed. And the daily complaining about still being pregnant.

... I'm going to be someone's mom.

That is really, really weird and scary.

Someone for the rest of their lives is going to do the following:
1) Call me Mom (or mommy, or madre or mother [weird])
2) Call me when their mad at someone else just to vent.
3) Rely on me for money (Joke may be on them....)
4) Call when they don't know how to do something
5) Call when they need to know what can be washed with what
6) Call when they don't know how long something should be cooked
7) Avoid my phone calls
8) Be embarrassed by the way I dress
9) Sometimes dislike me
10) Always love me.

Here are a few more pictures of my mom... Just because we never see any OLD OLD pictures on here...

I have no idea where this picture was from, but I know my grandmother is in the left corner
Check out the vest with the skirt. Always on the latest trends my mom is.

This is mom at the wedding... She was having such a good time, some of my favorite pictures of her are from that night.

Since they say I'm having a girl, I am really excited because I can see from many generations that daughters will take care of their old and decrepit parents (and in-laws in my case) where sons don't always step up for the job.

So that's something.

The thought of someone relying on me, the way I rely on my mom, is terrifying.

But also wonderful... and really really scary.

I was 21 like a BLINK ago...

Now I'm not 21 and having a little girl. Who people say I will form and make into a grown person.

I have seen enough episodes of Intervention (I could be an addict to it myself) to know... that if Charlie and I mess up... we could have like a crack addict or something on our hands.

That's not frightening enough is it?

Happy Almost Halloween... that's a lie, Halloween is more than a month away.

Monday, September 24, 2012


This post is devoted completely to the fact that I am trying to enjoy the last weeks of pregnancy.

And the fact that soon enough the belly will be gone and replaced with a weird half cooked muffin thing.

I have been entertaining Charlie, in between him getting me water and doing every task I've asked of him...

with a dance move that looks something like this.

Cut to seconds 0.23 and 1:03 for the good stuff.

This may or may-not be shaking her up like a washing machine.

And I don't do it ALL the time...

But it's fun, and makes me laugh, and when you're guessing at every little thing, hoping it's an early sign of labor...

Life is way too short not to laugh at yourself, or your belly...

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Judgey Eyes

Last week I had the second of my emotional breakdown sessions (the first one was early on and involved Chipolte... which I've found is surprisingly common among pregnant women)

This one involved me getting all weepy over the thought of NOT having the extra poundage on me, and for missing the growth... that's mean I know... but she IS growing... I was looking in the mirror in our bathroom and thinking that I may never get this feeling again. And how wonderful and amazing the human body is that I can do these things (and apparently can get the baby out too, I'm skeptical)

Anyway, a dear friend Meredith, who has the pleasure of listening (reading) my daily complaining, thought it would be a nice idea for me to jot down all of the things I'm going to miss about being knocked up.

Let's Begin.

1) Having a place to rest my hands in forced conversation.
I don't actually remember what I did with my hands before the belly became their natural location. I guess I was holding some booze if we're going to be honest here. But at a wedding this past weekend I found myself unconsciously resting my hands on and rubbing the belly. I'm sure people were all "Ohh look at the sweet very very pregnant girl over there" and all I was thinking was... I hope this conversation would wrap up so I can find whoever is passing that chicken satay with the tzatziki sauce....and I want some wine... think people with judge?

2) Selfishly sleeping in the bed alone
Charlie and I have gotten into the horrible habit of letting this creature sleep in bed with us.

Ghastly, I know.

We have a recently (6 months ago) acquired a queen sized bed... previously we were one of those sickeningly sweet couples that huddled together on a full for the first 1.5 years of marriage. Good thing we're done with all that :)

Anyway. About 2 months ago I started getting really big and uncomfortable with Charlie, Myself, Baby, and beast in the bed. So Charlie "took it upon himself" to sleep on the little - no padding - from my grandfather's house - twin bed. Where he and Buckley sleep now. Meaning... I get the big bed all to myself, and I love it.
I have vowed (heh) that once baby comes, I'm positive I'll be so tired I could sleep in the dog crate and still be happy for the rest. Meaning he can join me nightly again... as long as he doesn't mind the ever 2 hour feedings, considering Mary Margaret is going to be in her bassinet in our room for a while.

3) Ability to eat my non-normal food items without guilt
Yes, I'll admit that after YEARS of weight issues (this is not going to turn into one of "those" blogs, promise) I have food guilt. There. I said it.
I really do love vegetables and cottage cheese, and all of those healthy things that I'm supposed to eat. I do!! But having a slice of pizza or two pre-pregnancy I would make a special effort to watch the intake the next day, or spend a little longer on the spin bike... or run a little more than the norm. But the ability to have that pizza or sweet potato fries (and not the "healthy baked" ones) was nice. I haven't been going overboard (although my body seems to think I've been eating Whoppers and Milkshakes for the last 9 months).  I'm hoping that I can get back into "normal" eating once the time requires it. I don't think that eating guacamole with almost every Mexican meal is going to be excusable anymore... and I'm going to miss it...

4) Enjoying the "rounder" figure
Ok, last time I'll say it... I've had my issues with weight. Done.

So being able to embrace my fuller face, thundering thighs, and (let's be honest) cellulite has been a new and life changing event... ok that last one was a complete lie... I still don't like the cellulite.

But the ability to get over the fact that clothes are way tight, and that you're going to have a double (read: triple) chin in EVERY ANGLE of every picture and it's OK is amazing. And that is what your body is supposed to do, within a relative measure. I think a pregnant woman is natural and beautiful. So giving that whole thing up to have a spare tire for abs and bags under my eyes for months doesn't sound all-together appealing...

5) Carrying my daughter around with me
It's been super convenient for me to just carry around a little girl, who I'm feeding (and changing)... unconscionably for the last 9+ months. That is seriously going to be different when she comes out, like whoa. Hope she likes diapers and a bassinet, because she's got that to look forward to.

And we've bonded... like she's never bonded with anyone else. Not to mention she's been tethered to my insides, so I mean, that's a whole new level.

6) Having people cater to me
This is a really important one.
People at work aren't as sympathetic... which is fine, because they are 99% women, who have given birth, and know that you can get up and do some things yourself, women for centuries before would be working in the field and raising other children... I sit at a desk all day. And honestly, you need the movement anyway.

My non-pregnant friends are very accommodating, especially when it comes to where/what to eat. Little do they know I could eat ANYTHING... but can usually not go wrong with Mexican, Greek, Frozen Yogurt, Salad Bar, Chili, Wings, Pizza, Mexican :), Subs....the list could go on forever.

But dear, sweet, doting Charlie. He has always been so kind to ask if I need anything, and he washes the dishes in a reasonable amount of time. Even if I try to wash them he steps in.

Yes, Ladies... I win on the husband doing the dishes front. Try to stifle your jealousy.

Also, refer to # 2...'nuff said.

7) Really nice hair
Women's bodies are at least nice enough to give you nice hair to work with, when it isn't turning your face into some weird blotchy art project. You could give the cred to the prenatal vitamins, but I might as well give it to myself...

If nothing else is going to work like it's "supposed to", your hair might as well pick up the slack.

As if the previous topics were not enough.... here are a few things I'm not going to miss...

1) Having to making numerous noises to roll myself out of bed
2) The inability for my face to be one color at one time... please refer to this that I have not tried....
3) Lack of dressing options. I have gotten into the habit of wearing the same dress 3 times a week, and not even with some different accessories... just the dress. Any my bra straps are probably going to be showing. So there.
4) Not having a glass of wine... which I have been allowing myself...in public for fear of peoples' "Judgy Eyes"
5) The fear that I have gone up a 1/2 size in all of my shoes. I have a killer pair of Steve Madden boots (that I've worn religiously for 2 seasons... that's why they are justifiable) that I wore last week and they started KILLING my feet. It really makes me mad/sad to think they may be done.
6) Having to explain to those cute, thin, never-been-pregnant ladies about what the worst things about being pregnant is.
7) Begin sweating trying to PUT ON gym clothes. Note: all workout short do not fit. Only VERY stretchy yoga pants are an option now, and wearing them in North Carolina humidity is super pleasant.
8) Running to the restroom only to find that you need to pee 2 ounces.
9) Thinking there may be "something going on" when you just need to use the bathroom.
10) Sitting is all chairs, including particular passenger seats
11) Fearing the "Belly Patter" who rides the late morning bus.

OK. I think that has been enough for you to read without the much appreciated break of pictures.

Ta Ta For Now!

P.S. I just found out I've been wearing my shirt backwards all day. Do I care to change it? No.

P.S.S Honesty time: I'm drinking a Cherry Coke Zero. Feel free to judge... with your Judgy Eyes.....

Tuesday, September 11, 2012


To Start, I'm going to have a natural childbirth.

There, I said it (that makes it true right?)

In the middle of the whole thing I may, just may, begin to say thing like Amy Poehler does below...

That's why Charlie and I have a code word.... I'm not going to tell you what it is, because I'm trying to forget it. Which will make it much harder to say...

We are preparing ourselves for this hellish (some say beautiful) day by having a Midwife from the Midwifery Group at the Durham Women's Health Alliance. And also using a Doula ... that links for you that have no idea what a doula is... you're welcome.

There really isn't any more to this post. I really just wanted to use the youtube clip because I like that scene so much. The whole movie is pretty fantastic, if you're into the whole really funny, kinda weird pregnancy stuff. Or if you just like Tina Fey and Amy Poehler together, which, let's be honest. You're not a real person if you don't think they're funny.

Also, I'm officially one month from my Due date... let the countdown begin...
Cross your fingers I:
1) make it through the wedding we're going to 2 hours away this weekend and
2) don't go past 38 week... now that's just me being selfish.

Speaking of wonderfully funny people, this kinda breaks my heart. I called Charlie on the way home on Thursday and he told me he had bad news. I thought he was going to say we are out of goat cheese or something, but this is MUCH worse.

Ok, Done!

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Greek-Nasty (Updated)

To start... that title is deceiving

Charlie has been wanting me to write about my revelation for a little while now..
 but the constant complaining about being pregnant still takes ALL MY TIME!

 I am a (flavored) Greek Yogurt convert.

There, I said it.

I had been, and still use nasty plain Greek Yogurt in place of sour cream, where it belongs. As a condiment.

The beginning of the end was when were having dinner with sweet sweet Dani at Speaking of the Speights and her beyond funny husband Carson at Isn't that Random. Dani was telling me that Carson had accidentally thrown away her large tub of Plain Greek Yogurt (rightfully) because he thought it was "normal" yogurt that had gone bad.

I'm not sure why I included that part... but anyway Dani vowed to make me try her honey/Greek yogurt concoction that night. Thankfully, I made it outta there without the torture. But told her I would try the "honey at the bottom" kind when we went to the store next.

She badgered me about it for a good week...

Then, like the good, honest to my word, person I am, I kept my word and picked up the honey and blueberry flavors.

UPDATE: Ty Paul Monroe does have a very real hand in this come-to-Greek conversation. I was semi-forced to try the pre-mixed Greek yogurt variety at his house weeks before the Speight confrontation. I do need to give credit where it is due.

I hate to admit it. She was right. They are good. ::hangs head in shame::

I immediately went and got 6 more of the Blueberry (admit it. The honey isn't as good as the blueberry). 

I then made the commitment and got a whole buncha them from Costco... and then gave away the pineapple to my other Greek yogurt loving friend Meredith ... not feeling that one either, man I'm picky...

Anyway... Point being, I'm now hooked. Charlie isn't a convert just yet (I just force feed him some when I make my little parfait at home) but I feel it may be soon... maybe not. I don't know.

That yellow thing is a pencil... I keep a hyper clean desk and work. Not.
It's also not in the yogurt, just really close to it.

I'm not a minimalist anything, I still have to put AT LEAST a serving of Kashi Go-Lean Crunch (cereal of choice for the last 10 years) in to the weird smelling cup-o-joy before I eat it.

Monday, September 3, 2012

Truths about being 8.5 months pregant

I'm back... and still more pregnant than ever.


I don't want her to come just yet... but if she did, I wouldn't be too angry.

Here's why.

1) I can't even adapt clothes to fit me anymore

If you would please refer to my "mumu" post, you would see how bad things have gotten... for anything new I'm pretty much down to taking a curtain and pulling a badly done Scarlet O'Heara (ie. adding a fashionable looking belt) and calling it a shirt-too short dress- something to cover myself.

Or I just wear shirts that only cover close to half of my stomach and rely on the FULL panel of my bottoms to do rest of the dirty work.

2) I'm starting to get light headed while standing still

It can happen anywhere. But it has mostly been during Mass and waiting for my husband to finish conversations (selective? I wish)

It also happened while looking for something in the grocery store today. I'll be standing there like a normal person, and then BOOM. I'm beginning to sweat, and if I don't move again soon, I'll get that light-headed fuzzy behind the eyes kinda feeling. I thought I may have to sit down in the middle of the aisle, not embarrassing in the least.

I talked to a few people and the OB office (along with the wonderful Nurse Practitioner I work with) and she said everything is cool. It's just a mix of all of the fluid (at least 15 pounds right?) floating around my system, and the fact I have fairly low blood pressure. awesome.

3) My thighs are becoming best-of-friends

I'm not one of those girls who are bow-legged and have to FORCE their thighs to meet, but when in good shape I can get through a good walk without thigh rubbing issue.

This has ALL changed in the last few months. Especially since the humidity is over 100% for long stretches of summer. COMBINED with the fact I only enjoy wearing dresses/skirts while this pregnant.

It has really been making walks feel less appealing than normal.

4) Swimming is the only form of exercise I enjoy

Luckily we have a few pools in the area that I have access to, so it's not for lack of options. But (refer to #3) walking, which was my go-to form of exercise during this pregnancy, has become compromised. Also, if you live in the Southeast at all you know that the humidity has been out of this planet recently. So stepping outside for more than 3.8 seconds you begin to sweat profusely... even if you're just ONE person, not to mention TWO.

Those poolside get a nice view of the largely pregnant women and can then think how nice they look in their bathing suits. You're all welcome.

5) Sitting has become uncomfortable
Any position, almost any chair.

The pressure that the sweet little offspring is introducing to my diaphragm has become unbearable in any position other than laying. Which is making nap time become much more appealing that anything else. Including cleaning (surprised?). I would say that standing would be an option... but please reference #2 for more information on current standing status.

I do have the ever popular, and easy to hide when company comes, exercise ball. But unless we're watching TV that I am very interested in **Note, we don't have cable**, you can only just sit on the ball. Not balance a computer, or book (arms get tired). And that can only work for a while, before I start getting uncomfortable again.

6) I can see my feet still, but not much else

The belly has hindered me from seeing anything around the waistline, and down to my knees.

Charlie happened to let me walk around the mall (not that the mall is a big deal... Sears on the Brady Bunch Movie or anything) with a large white stain on my denim skirt.

It was toothpaste... how it made it past my belly I have no idea.

He doesn't proceed to tell me until I'm about this until HOURS later as I'm about to leave to go do school work at a coffee shop. He never realized I possibly couldn't see it, and assumed I'd wanted to leave it there. Super.

7) We are becoming more weird and potentially embarrassing

We gaining the traits that I will assume embarrass our future children.

Example: We have begun walking the stroller around the neighborhood with the car seat clicked in, but obviously no child. This has become confusing to neighbors who are not overly connected to us, but still know we are/were pregnant. They will tell the kids selling coupon books to congratulate us on the baby. We then have to tell them we are just "practicing with Buckley to make sure he'll do well walking with the stroller". I'm just pumped to have our stroller and car seat.

Her due date has been October 11, but she has been measuring a week big at the last couple of appointments, so I'm hoping that means she is going to come a week (or 2) early!

(If that is not true, please don't tell me... I don't really want to know)