Weekend

My sweet sweet mother  came to visit me stopped by to see Mary Margaret on Saturday morning and stayed until Sunday morn. It was a whirlwind of baby holding/loving/hugging and shopping. Ohh and driving through numerous parking decks looking for a spot at the mall. Ugh.

HELLO Belk One Day sale. It was great! We got some super deals. Sorry you missed it.

Both nights of the weekend (is Friday night considered the weekend?) there was an issue with Mary Margaret's sleeping. One was self-administered when I tried to following the Sleep Consultant's suggestion of putting her to bed "Awake and Aware" which consisted of me going up there 5 times because she was screaming bloody murder. I then gave in and soothed and rocked her to sleep. Bam. She Wins

Then on Saturday night she went to bed really easy with my soothehertosleepdon'tmakeasound technique. Then at her 1:30 am and 5:30 am feedings she was struggling and tugging and crying while nursing. It was very confusing and frustrating. I can't figure out why she does it and I hope (pray?) that is is just a phase she'll grow out of. I also have my thoughts it has to do with my let-down which I'm not sure how I change that. I may ask my BFF and baby/parenting go-to Nancy for some advice.

One reason I was having a tough night is because I was laboring over the though of having to go back to work. It's like 4 weeks away, but the thought makes my eyes fill with tears. Thursday, January 3rd is going to be my first day back, and the thought kills me. I really want to stay home with her. The thought of her doing more cute firsts with someone else makes me incredibly jealous, and they haven't even happened yet. Also, the thought of giving up exclusively breast-feeding her, and having someone else be her source of nutrient (understanding, of course that I will be pumping for her).  I selfishly want to have control over her eating, changing, and what she's wearing; (was that the right punctuation there?) trusting someone else to know how to do it for a whole day while I'm in another city for 8-10 hours is terrifying. OK, I may need a second here to collect myself.

Ok back.
We are going to the Christmas "New or Soon-to-be Parent" meet up for the Sacred Heart Cathedral Young Adults Group (confusing enough). I had grand ideas to make this crab dip that I found at 5am while nursing one night... I think we know how well this turned out... I sent Charlie to the store to get the essentials for it. Made in Sunday morning, I will admit there may have been a shake too many of Cheyenne pepper, it was like a creamy-spicy non-crab tasting mess. Charlie was sweet to try and make it seem redeemable, but it was kinda just spicy blah that if you only looked at it, looked like peppermint gross (got the visual?). So I went with plan B, which mom had suggested, a pre-made spinach dip that was made with Greek yogurt (yay!) from Costco put into my own bowl. Yes, I like to cheat like that.

This is how excited Buckley is over the dip